


Accidentally-But-Actually-Purposefully

by ToSeeAMarchingBand



Series: Byler dump [2]
Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Aged up characters, Coming Out, Established Relationship, Ferris Buellers Day Off is in there, M/M, Mention of Richie Tozier for comedic purposes, Mike and Will need to chillax, Nobody Dies, Robin is dope as hell, The harringrove is a joke, They tell all of their friends about their relationship, almost a 4+1 thing but not quite, also a brief reference to Jack and Dean, it just SEEMS like it, theyre like 16
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-24
Updated: 2019-07-24
Packaged: 2020-07-12 13:53:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19947232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ToSeeAMarchingBand/pseuds/ToSeeAMarchingBand
Summary: Mike and Will have decided it's time to come out to their friends, but in ways that seem like an accident.





	Accidentally-But-Actually-Purposefully

**Author's Note:**

> It astounds me that the word count is this long and that I WROTE this much. It's crazy, but it's also a double edged sword: I didn't read through to check for mistakes, so if you find any, PLEASE don't hesitate to tell me

They had been dating for months. Nobody knew, of course (except Will’s mom, Jonathan, and Nancy, who had all walked in on them at some point during the beginning stages of their relationship), as it was the 80’s and more people were homophobic than had mullets.

Mike and Will were as careful as could be. They didn’t so much as cuddle when they knew someone else was in the house, so it was quite the surprise to Joyce when she came home one day after being at work, and he told her that the entire Party now knew they were dating. 

“How’d that happen?” She asked. 

~*~

Mike looked down at his boyfriend, smiling softly. He and Will had had the house to themselves the entire day, the rest of Will’s family being out on a very long errands run. 

He leaned in for another kiss, Will reciprocating immediately, before pulling away after a few moments. 

“We should tell the Party,” he mumbled, mere centimeters away from Mike’s lips. 

The other boy looked at him in confusion. “Where’s this coming from?”

“I dunno, I just-“ Will sighed, leaning back a bit on the couch. “I wanna do stuff like this more often, you know? It’s super hard to get privacy like right now, and it’d be easier if everyone knew,” he reasoned, knowing his boyfriend almost certainly wouldn’t say no.

Mike considered this, before nodding a bit. “Alright. Ok. Then we need a plan,”

“I already have one,” Will said, cracking his knuckles and grabbing a binder from under his couch, Leslie Knope style. Mike was almost impressed just by the cover, which read “Totally gross pictures of moldy bread and other spoiled foods, do not open!”, and had a collage of an assortment of disgusting foods. 

“This is your plan?” He asked Will, who stared him straight in the eyes as he opened the binder. 

“I made these lists when I was planning on coming out as gay a while ago, so before we started dating,” he explained, flipping it around to show Mike the first page in the binder. 

“This is just a bunch of fucking moldy bread-“

“Oh yeah my bad, deterrent, you know?” He laughed, flipping through to the middle of the binder, where he came across a normal piece of paper with just a list on it. 

“What is this?” Mike asked, reading down it. 

“This first list is one I made a while ago, it goes from most possibly homophobic to least possibly homophobic,” he explained, pointing to the top and bottom of the list, respectively. 

Mike nodded in understanding. “Yeah I see- wait why is my name at the top of the list?” He asked, turning it around to where lo and behold, the name at the very beginning was “Mike” with a heart dotting the i and a frowny face afterward. 

“Well your family is pretty well off,” Will tried to reason. 

“Was that the deciding factor?” 

“And have you met your parents?” 

“Fair point,” Mike said, flipping the page. “Continue,”

“This one...” Will said, looking over it quickly to jog his memory (there weren’t any titles on the lists in case anyone ignored the warnings of spoiled food, and decided to look anyway), “this is most likely to keep my secrets, to least likely to,” he explained, and Mike smiled. 

“Aw I’m on top again,”

“Yeah,” Will frowned. “If it were anyone else’s secrets you’d be somewhere in the middle and Max would be on top, but because it was MY secret, I think you wouldn’t tell anyone,”

Mike smiled and gave Will a gentle kiss on the forehead, then motioned for the boy to continue. 

“This one!” Will said, leaning over. “Is most gullible to least gullible,” he said, pointing to Lucas on the top of the list. 

“Why am I second on the list?”

“You believed me for 8 years when I denied having crushes,” Mike gave him a look to prompt Will. “And you’re so fucking oblivious,”

Mike looked about to protest, but then nodded solemnly. “Fair,” he looked the list over again, then glanced curiously at Will. “Why do you have this list though?”

“So my original coming out plan was actually to wait a few years, then accidentally-but-actually-purposefully reveal my gay sex tapes, but then I realized Max would probably think it was a weird joke, or realize releasing them wasn’t an accident,” he explained, already closing the binder and glossing over everything he just said as if it were perfectly normal. 

“I mean we could still do that,” Mike said, smirking a bit. Will gently shoved him. “So what’s our ACTUAL game plan? We have these lists, but what are you planning?” His boyfriend smiled. 

~*~

“You want me to what?” Steve asked, ignoring Robin’s yell from behind him to keep his ass working. 

“The next time Dustin comes to go to the theater, lead him to the wrong one,” he nodded, eyebrows furrowing at the thought of misleading his favorite kid. 

“Why?”

***

“What’s this list?”

“Most observant to least observant,” Will said. “Dustin is on top, because he looks around, you know?” He sounded vague, but Mike thought he was entirely correct. 

***

“Can we tell you a secret out back?” Mike whispered across the counter, and Steve, noticing his seriousness, agreed and let them through. 

They quickly walked past Robin, who gave them a small nod at the sight of their joined hands. 

Turing to face Steve once they got outside and the coast was clear (they had immediately checked, nobody was around), Will spoke out first. 

“I’m gay,” Steve nodded. 

“Thank you for telling me,” he said, looking ready to continue when Mike interrupted. 

“I’m bi,” Steve then noticed the two of them holding hands. 

“You know, I think I can see where this is going,”

“We’re dating and in love,” Will said, and his boyfriend nodded. Steve smiled. 

“Well thanks for telling me, but why everything with Dustin?”

***

“Will, I think your plan is crazy enough that it just might work,”

“Mike stop being such a fucking cliche it’s not THAT wild of a plan,”

***

“We’re coming out to each of our friends individually, but each time making it look like an accident so they don’t spill,” Will said, now licking the rainbow sherbet Robin had brought out for the two of them. (When Steve asked how she knew, both she and Will answered “gaydar” But Mike stayed silent because Mike is too oblivious to have a gaydar)

“Elaborate,” Steve said, listening intently to the two. 

“Well if we come out to one person, they could accidentally reveal us without thinking-“ Will began. 

“- and we want to have complete control over the situation,” Mike added. 

“So if we accidentally-but-actually-purposefully reveal ourselves, they’re going to put WAY more effort into keeping our secret, because there won’t be a little part of their brain saying ‘well they’re going to tell everyone anyway’, you know?” Will reasoned, earning a nod from Steve. 

“Right,” Steve said, still looking like he was thinking deeply. “I understand. Has it occurred to you,” he said, now pointing to the two of them. “To tell everyone together?” Will quickly nodded. 

“Yes, but Mike is a dramatic and edgy bitch and needs to be extra,” Will said, and his boyfriend nodded a confirmation. 

“Alright whatever you two say,” Steve said, still thinking. “But can I suggest an easier plan for the Dustin thing? Because honestly you’re going at this the wrong way,”

***

“Hey Steve can I get through?” Dustin said, smiling at the man. 

***

“Oh absolutely. We’re nerdy teens, of course we’re going to overthink this,” Mike said, already motioning for Steve to start talking. 

***

Steve let Dustin back, watching as he ran through the halls until he turned a corner, then leaned into his walkie talkie. 

“Dustin is going in, I repeat, Dustin is going in, over,” he muttered into the speaker, then got back to his job. 

Down the hallway, the boy in question, who was sipping on a soda while jogging a bit, made it to the theatre in time for the previews. 

He had asked everyone else to come, but Jane, Mike, and Will didn’t respond, and Lucas and Max were already going on a date, so he went alone. 

Unbeknownst to Dustin, following right behind him were Nancy and Jonathan. They had been asked to go to the theatre, sit directly behind Dustin, and then leave when the boy went to the bathroom. 

***

“You said Dustin always goes to the bathroom during a movie?”

“Yeah,” Will nodded, looking over to his boyfriend who nodded too. 

“He’s always drinking a soda, and he can’t hold in his piss,”

“Use that to your advantage, dudes, exploit the hell out of that,”

***

Only an hour into the movie, Dustin got up to leave, very quickly followed by Nancy and Jonathan. They all made their way outside, and once Dustin was in the bathroom, Nancy got her walkie talkie from her purse. 

“Dustin is in the Bathroom. Send in the boys to theater 3. Over,” she said, already leaving with Jonathan, knowing they couldn’t dawdle and risk getting spotted by Dustin. 

Steve, hearing the word on his radio, sent Mike and Will down, the two sprinting to the theater. 

They got to the film quickly, hoping that Dustin hadn’t already finished and was back inside. Crossing their fingers, the two made it in and saw 3 empty seats, one in the 7th row, and 2 directly behind that in the 8th row. 

They quickly found their spots, everyone else too engulfed in the movie to even notice the fact that these people were NOT the people that left, and settled in. 

Not even moments after they got comfortable, Dustin came back in, and walked up the steps towards his seat. 

***

“Or,” Robin, who had joined them when there was a lull in the amount of customers they’d be getting. “You could just wait for him in the bathroom. I don’t know, be making out when he got in there,”

“Yeah but that’d require them to be making out for the entire time to be prepared for whenever Dustin got in there,” Steve reasoned. The teens glanced at each other. 

“Neither of us are against that at all,”

“Could you two do that for like 2 hours straight?” Robin asked, looking curious but also like she didn’t want to know the answer. 

“Our record is 5 hours and we only stopped because someone came home,” Mike said, and Steve looked at him in suspicion. 

“Was there fucking involved? It doesn’t count if you two fucked in the middle, you can’t fuck in a bathroom,” all three of them gasped. 

“STEVE!” Robin cried. “NOT IN FRONT OF THE CHILDREN AND THEIR VIRGIN EARS!” She shouted, pointing to the boys, Mike’s fake affronted expression almost making her laugh and drop the act. “POOR LITTLE WILL HERE PROBABLY DOESN’T EVEN KNOW WHAT SEX IS!”

“Michale what does it mean to FUCK?” Will asked, tears in his eyes. 

***

Dustin stopped in his tracks when he saw Mike and Will, his first thought being “Hey they made it!” 

As he got closer, his thoughts changed to something along the lines of “are they cuddling?”

When he got to his seat, he spared one last glance back, neither of the boys noticing (they did, they just didn’t look back at Dustin), and saw Will’s head leaning on Mike’s shoulder, and their hands intertwined. 

Dustin was glad he hadn’t been drinking his soda, because if he had, he would have done a spit take. 

***

“You made elaborate plans like this for all of your friends?” Steve confirmed, getting nods from the two teens. “How will it come to a T if your endgame is to eventually just be able to hold hands in front of them?” He asked. 

“We’ll probably just kiss in front of them,” Will said, shrugging a bit. Steve frowned. 

“But what about when they all freak out because they think they were the only one that knew, and then everyone else is acting weird?”

“Then we’ll just accuse them of being homophobic, maybe Will sheds a fake tear about it or something, that’d shut em up,” Mike said. 

“Whatever,”

***

Dustin could barely pay attention to the rest of the movie, knowing his two friends were back there, acting like a couple like that in full view of the entire theater. 

He wasn’t homophobic or anything, no, it was just a huge surprise. (Will would have made an oblivious list, but he knew it was a lost cause because ALL of his friends were really oblivious) OTHER people were homophobic, that’s what Dustin was worried about. 

***

“Well nerds, I have to get back to work,” Steve said, herding them back into the ice cream shop. “Tell me when the day comes, alright? And ask me if you need any more help,” he said, pushing them out the door. 

“Thanks Steve!” Will said from in front of the counter, as Mike waved goodbye. 

***

After the movie was over, Dustin saw the couple go into the bathroom, and followed them inside. (This was planned, of course. They knew Dustin would want to confront them)

“Hey guys,” he said to the two who were washing their hands at the sinks. Their eyes widened when they saw him, but they smiled as they greeted him. 

“Hey Dustin, what are you doing here?” Will asked, and Mike rolled his eyes. 

“I was seeing a movie...” he said. The two nodded. 

“Us too,” 

“That’s why we’re in a movie theater bathroom,” Mike interrupted. 

***

“Everything has GOT to be scripted,” Will said, Mike nodding, already pulling out a notebook to write down ideas. 

***

“What movie did you guys see?” Dustin asked, even though he knew the answer to the question. 

“Ferris Bueller’s Day Off. How about you?”

“I saw that too,” he said, noticing the now scared expressions on his friends faces. “I uh...” he muttered, not sure how to breach the topic. “I also saw you two. In there,” Mike stepped in front of Will. 

“And what about it?” He asked, and Dustin knew there were very few correct answers to this question. 

“Are you two... you know...” he said, deciding to instead reach his hand up and cross his fingers to demonstrate “...dating?” He practically whispered. 

They stared at him for a few moments, before both of them, wide eyed in fear, nodded. 

“You can’t tell anyone! Please!” Will said from behind Mike, the other boy shaking his head furiously. 

Dusting nodded, holding his hands up in surrender. “Ok I won’t, I promise you guys,” he said, before then reaching his hands out to pinkie swear the two. “You two look happy together,” he said. Will smiled. 

They all nodded, left the bathroom, and went their separate ways, neither Will nor Mike hearing Dustin mutter “finally,”

~*~

“Ok, Dustin’s down,” Will said, crossing the name off on another sheet of paper in the spoiled food binder. Mike looked over. 

“What list is that?”

“Oh it’s just a name list. Not every list is a cool list Michale,” he said, looking down. 

“Huh,”

“I mean it also goes in order of who we’re coming out to,”

“Fucker. Who’s next?”

***

Max was at the arcade alone today. Despite what the others think, she does this often, and it really doesn’t bother her at all. 

Today, she was playing Dig Dug, obviously, it’s her favorite game, but when she finished, she noticed something peculiar about the leaderboard. 

“Mike is on top, and Will is second?” She said, looking closely at the screen. “This can’t possibly me MY Mike and Will,” she reasoned. 

Whether or not it was actually her friends that beat her score, she absolutely demolished them without hesitation and reclaimed top on the leaderboard in one try, deciding to forget what just happened. 

***

“First things first we need a key to the arcade,” Will said, pulling out yet another list. 

“Why?” 

“Do YOU think in the span of time that the arcade is open we could get on the leaderboards of Dig Dug?”

“No, I find it hard to believe we could get on the leaderboards at all,” 

***

As Max continued to play on the different machines, she noticed something horrifying about each and every single one. 

It wasn’t Mindflayer horrifying, or even scary movie horrifying. No. It was mess with your brain type horrifying. Max was having an identity crisis because of this. 

After each and every game she played, at the very top of the leaderboard would be Mike, followed by Will, or Will followed by Mike, or even, on one rare occasion, Mike AND Will. 

“What the fuck...” she mumbled, knowing full well that neither of her friends were good enough at every single game in the arcade to get their names on the leaderboards of EVERY SINGLE GAME. 

***

“I just don’t know how we’re going to get a key to the arcade. We’re not good friends with anyone that works there, and-“

“I have a key,” Mike said. 

“You what,”

***

Max was genuinely baffled. She decided against pursuing further, realizing that it didn’t actually matter that much, and that she’d just ask them about it when she next saw them. 

Of course, it’d be discreet, and in no way would reveal that she thought they got both their names on every leaderboard, as that would inflate their egos a little too much if it was a different Mike and Will. 

***

“Where on earth did you get a key to the arcade?” 

“I don’t know, I’ve pretty much always had it I guess?”

“THEN WHY HAVEN’T YOU BROUGHT THIS UP SOONER?”

“I’m sorry Will,”

“Think about how many GAMES we could have played by now,” Will was practically in tears. 

***

Max was the last one to leave Mike’s house after their study group. Besides Will and Jane, of course, because they were siblings, and they usually didn’t leave Mike’s for a solid hour after everyone else left, but that was even more perfect for what she needed to do. 

“So guys,” she said, totally inconspicuously, when Jane was upstairs in the bathroom. Mike had a fairly large house, and her friend was extraordinarily good at getting lost despite familiar settings, so Max knew she had time to interview the two. 

They looked up from some random binder they were whispering about (the cover had pictures of rotten food on it, she did NOT want to ask), a startled expression on their faces. 

“Oh. Max. We thought you left,”

“Why?”

“Well,” they looked at each other, stumbling for an answer, clearly flustered. “Everyone else left?” Mike said in a pitiful attempt to reason with her. 

“Will’s still here,”

“Yeah but he doesn’t count,” Mike quickly told her, rolling his eyes a bit, Will nodding from next to him. Max sighed and decided to move on with it. 

“So. You two been to the arcade recently?”

***

“Ok so now that we can get in, what’s the plan?”

“Honestly I didn’t have one, I expected in our search to get a key, we’d find an even better plan,” Will said, flipping the binder to a page that said: “Arcade Plan: Step 1) find a key, Step 2) get a better plan”. 

“Ah,”

***

“Yeah,” Will said, looking to Mike for confirmation, Max’s heart speeding up at the horrifying thought that her idiot friends got on all of the leaderboards. 

“You were with us, Max, last week,” Mike said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world, because it was, to them. 

Max almost let out an audible sigh of relief, but didn’t, as she was too cool to do that. 

“Why?”

“Oh I was thinking about going to the arcade later, and was wondering if you guys wanted to come,” she said, thankful for her quick thinking skills, and her Masters Degree in the art of Lying. 

“Oh yeah,” Mike said, leaning back in his seat, Will next to him. “I’m always dtf,”

“Dee Tee Ef? What does that mean?” She said, staring at the two like they were time travelers or something. 

“Down to fight. Aliens. Space Invader? It’s an acronym,” Will explained as if it were common knowledge. “You know, take the first letter-“

“I know what an acronym is,” Max snapped, glaring at the two who she was now noticing were suspiciously close together. Like, Mike’s left thigh pressed all the way against Will’s right. The way her and Lucas usually sit. 

Mike shrugged, but startled when he heard a honking outside the house. Max sighed. 

“My brother’s here to pick me up, see you guys later,” she said, slinging her bag over her shoulder. 

“Oh!” Will said, stopping her in her tracks halfway up the stairs. “Tell Steve I said hi,”

“Steve isn’t my brother?”

“He essentially is at this point,” 

***

“Ok initiate operation: child endangerment,” Will said suddenly, the moment Max was gone. No one realized how long Jane had been in the bathroom. 

“What?”

“Shit wrong plan hold on,” he mumbled, flipping through the pages in the binder until he reached the one he wanted, then smiled. 

“Max already suspects something, so we have to move quickly,” Mike said, staring intensely at his boyfriend, hoping to drive the point across that they had NO time to spare. 

“We could always just like... fuck with her, you know?” Will said, shrugging. Mike looked confused. 

“In what way?”

***

Max looked over at her friends and almost had a stroke. 

Mike had invited the Party over for a dinner and hang out session, followed afterwards by a sleepover that the girls weren’t invited to, the reason given being: 

“Well seeing as how all of us boys here are totally heterosexual, we wouldn’t pass up the opportunity to have incredible sex with girls if they were staying the night. We just couldn’t help having a massive orgy. Sorry ladies,” - Mike Wheeler. 

Currently, everyone was enjoying some pizza before they’d go downstairs to play some D&D, not noticing Mike and Will. 

They were feeding each other. Not even just one holding the slice up to the other’s mouth, no. They were using SILVERWARE on PIZZA like a couple of ANIMALS. 

Mike held the fork up to Will’s lips, the other boy smiling before taking the bite. 

Will spent an agonizing amount of time with his lips wrapped around the fork, a smile turning up at the corners, the two boys staring each other straight in the eyes. 

“What,” Max said, all attention at the table directed towards her. She tried to motion to the two weirdos, but by the time the rest of the table had glanced to where she was gesturing, the silverware was nowhere to be seen, and Will was happily chewing on a piece of pizza, looking at her inquisitively. 

***

“Let’s make her think we’re dating, but every time she tries to tell someone else, we’ll go back to normal,”

“I like where you’re heads at, Byers,”

***

No more incidents had occurred for the rest of the night, which was a fact Max was painfully aware was a blessing. 

The group had migrated down to Mike’s basement, the small table already set up to play the game. Already ready was the board they’d be using, and Mike’s DM station. 

The game started without a hitch. Everyone got situated and ready to play, and Mike introduced a story about a witch who banged a ghost so now there was a super powerful baby on the loose- an average game. 

It became a startlingly different game the moment Max looked up to see Mike and Will holding hands. Not even just Mike’s hand on top of the other boy’s, no. Their fingers were laced together and they looked incredibly comfortable like that. 

“Guys?” She said, hoping the others would look over and see what was happening, but they, once again, looked towards her. 

“Yeah Max?” Mike asked, now tapping his fingers on the table with the hand that HAD been holding Will’s, the other boy busy writing something. 

“Did none of you see that?” She said, gesturing to the two boys. The rest of the Party shrugged, not knowing what she was talking about, as none of them HAD seen it. 

“GAH!” Max screamed, slamming her head down on the table, slightly jostling the game. Everyone looked at her funny. 

***

“What should we do to be like ‘yeah we’re in love’?”

Mike considered this for a moment. “We’ll just make out,”

***

Max was about to leave, and she was no closer to figuring out what the FUCK was going on than she had been earlier. 

Jane had just gone upstairs with Will and Mike, Will saying he had to say bye to his sister, and Mike saying he’d be a terrible host if he didn’t see off his guests that weren’t invited to half the party. 

Max was sure they had gone up at least ten minutes ago, so stomping upstairs, but not enough to make Dustin or Lucas suspicious, she made her way towards the front door. 

“Hi Maxine, you’re leaving soon?” Karen, Mike’s mom, asked, in a tone that made her sound more like she was saying “what the fuck is a girl still doing in my house,”

“Yeah, Billy’s coming to pick me up soon,” she said, missing the way Karen’s eyes shimmered with tears at the thought of her brother. “I just forgot something upstairs, I’m going to get it real quick,” and with that she was off, taking two steps at a time to get to her friend’s room. 

Deciding against knocking, she just barged into Mike’s room, fully ready to cover her eyes in case her friends were fucking. 

Instead, Will was just drawing a little sketch while Mike was rifling through his stuff. 

“Hey,” he said, arms deep in a bin of old knick knacks he had. “I’m just looking for my magic 8 ball, I know it’s here somewhere,” he said, looking down in the bin in hopes of spotting it. 

“Ah,” Max said, leaning on the doorframe. “I just came up to say I was about to leave,” she said, already turning back to go downstairs. 

She made it halfway down the hall when she remembered that there was a magic 8 ball on a shelf in the basement. 

Going back, she pushed the door open again. “Mike-“ she stopped mid sentence. 

Mike and Will were full on making out. They were swapping spit, eating faces, tongue wrestling, playing tonsil hockey. 

“I KNEW IT!” She shouted, fist pumping the air, not seeing the panicked expressions on the boys’ faces. 

“You can’t tell ANYONE,” Mike said, deadly serious, which was odd for him. He was a dramatic bitch when he was fourteen, but in the past couple of years he’s mellowed out. 

Will looked close to tears. “Please if anyone found out-“

“Don’t worry guys,” Max said, feeling suddenly overprotective of the two. “I won’t tell a soul,” she said, happy that she both was right about them acting shady, and that they had finally confessed to liking one another. 

Outside, Billy honked his horn. “Catch ya later,” Max said, walking away. 

~*~

“That last one wasn’t nearly as elaborate as it could have been,” Mike sighed, flipping through the spoiled food binder. Will nodded solemnly. 

“At least it got the job done,” 

“That’s right. Just two to go,” he said, crossing Max’s name off the list. Will smiled. 

“What the fuck is that? Is that a hit list?” Jonathan asked from behind Mike, startling the two. 

“NO IT’S NOT SHUT UP GO AWAY JONATHAN!” Will shouted, throwing his pen at his brother. The man just laughed and walked away. 

Looking around to make sure no one else was around, Mike leaned forward. “Ok, what’s next?”

“Has your mom ever been a sexy nurse for Halloween?”

“Ew Will what kind of question IS that?” Mike said, leaning back. “What happened to being gay, Will, why does everyone think my mom is hot?”

***

Will wasn’t at school today, which was odd, considering the boy’s intense dedication to education. 

Jane didn’t know what to think of it. She should know what was happening, considering Will was her step brother and she LIVES with him, but no. 

Jane had spent the night at Max’s house in retaliation to the boy’s having THEIR night the week prior, so she didn’t know what was up with Will. 

It was safest to assume he had stayed home sick, but Jane has never known sicknesses to stop her brother. Had he had the option, he definitely would have attended school while he was fully possessed. 

So it must be BAD. Joyce probably had to tie him to his bed to make him stay home. Will wasn’t a coward. 

“Have any of you guys seen Will today?” Mike asked as soon as he sat down at their lunch table. The rest of the group shrugged, then turned to Jane, who also shrugged. 

“I was at Max’s last night, it was just him at home last night,” she explained, picking at her powdery mashed potatoes. 

The Party looked worried, but not enough to do anything until they got back from school. Mike looked by far the most distraught at the thought of his best friend gone again, so everyone throughout the day tried to console him. 

***

“We’re going to need a lot of unfamiliar people here, and we’re really unpopular, so where are we going to get so many actors and actresses?” Will said, biting on his pen a bit as he focused. Mike smiled. 

“I think I know a guy,”

***

“Hey ladies,” Billy said, smiling at the women who were still at the pool despite the leaves at the brink of turning brown. They all giggled and winked at him, completely unaware that he was dating another man. 

“Hi Billy,” one said in what was probably a pretty seductive voice for a middle aged woman. 

“I need y’all to do me a bit of a favor, can you provide?”

***

“So Steve was once a ladies man,” Will said. 

“Yes,”

“But then he stopped, and started dating Billy,”

“Yes,”

“Billy is STILL a ladies man?”

“Yes,”

“Our friends are going to find it suspicious when a bunch of 20 year olds are going around playing doctor,” Will warned, and Mike smirked. 

“Oh no, my dear, you’ve misinterpreted,”

***

The next thing Jane knew, she was at the hospital. To her left, Joyce was near tears, and to her right was the door to Will’s room. Nobody was allowed in yet, except Joyce, but she was out in the hall explaining what was happening. 

“Will has a very high fever, and he’s very very sick,” she said, her hands so tight on the plastic arms of her chair that her knuckles were white. 

Around her, all of her friends looked panicked, Mike and Steve most of all, which was reasonable, seeing as how Mike is Will’s best friend, and Steve is everyone’s mom. 

“Will he be ok?” Lucas asked, Max’s hand resting on his leg in a comforting gesture. She hadn’t known Will for nearly as long as Lucas, but she still cared deeply about him. 

“He should be fine, there are very good doctors in there right now working to fix him,” Joyce said, looking over at the door again. 

***

“Wait is THAT why you don’t ever want Billy coming into your house?”

“Yeah because my mom fucking thirsts after him, it’s uncomfortable,” 

***

Jane and the rest of the Party waited outside Will’s room for what seemed like hours, but was actually just about one. 

Eventually a doctor walked out of the room, her face mostly covered by one of those blue masks they’re always wearing. She motioned for the group to follow her into the room, and they quickly did so, anxious to see their friend. 

“Will will be fine, he just needs lots of fluids and lots of rest,” the doctor said, her voice almost familiar to Jane. It was like she had heard someone doing a mediocre impersonation of this doctor, and that’s where she knew her from. 

She opened the door, and at the sight of Will on the bed, sleeping but looking absolutely horrible, someone behind Jane gasped (everyone knew it was Mike). 

Will’s skin was all sweaty and gross, and he had dark bags under his eyes. 

“Oh my poor baby!” Joyce cried, rushing over to gently hold his hand in hers. Dustin was sniffling behind Jane. 

“When will he get better?” Mike asked the doctor, worry lacing his voice. The doctor shrugged. 

“I don’t know. Soon, most likely within this week, Mike,” she said, and nobody seemed to notice the doctor saying his name, everyone else too focused on will, except Jane and Mike. 

“How’d you know Mike’s name?” She asked quietly as to not disturb the rest of the group. Mike looked scared, which was understandable, seeing as how a stranger knew his name. (Mike was not scared because of this. He was scared that their plan would be ruined because his mom’s friend forgot that she wasn’t supposed to know him)

“I’m a doctor,” the lady explained. “I know everything,” Jane looked at her in awe. 

“Really? What’s my favorite color then?” She asked, excited about the fact that a doctor like this knew EVERYTHING. They must learn so much in all of their years in college. 

“Your favorite color is...” Mike, when Jane wasn’t looking, was desperately trying to stop his mom’s friend from answering. “... rainbow?” She guessed, her answer sounding like someone who didn’t know the answer on Jeopardy but was trying anyway. 

Jane looked at the doctor in amazement. 

“Holy shit,”

“Language young lady,” Hopper said from next to Joyce, giving Mike the stink eye as if MIKE taught Jane all of the cuss words she knows (He had). 

***

“So we need to hire a bunch of middle aged ladies to play doctors?”

“Most of them are friends with my mom,”

“How are we going to get them to do it?”

“I’ll call Steve,”

***

Suddenly, Will groaned in his bed and rolled over, his eyes landing on his friends around the room. 

“Guys!” He said in a weak voice, smiling slightly. Nobody could decide between saying “aww” at how absolutely adorable Will was, or running over and tackling him in a hug. 

Nobody besides Mike, that is, as he immediately leaped across the room and wrapped his best friend up in his arms. 

“WILL!” He cried, the other boy startled for only a moment, before he held Mike in a hug too, clearly not wanting to let go. 

“Hi Mike,” Will said, mumbling a bit. Mike was practically on top of Will, essentially IN his hospital bed. Dustin and Max both smirked, not to each other, but at the albeit incorrect, knowledge that they were the only people that knew Mike and Will were dating. 

The doctor left, and everyone sat around the hospital room, prepared to keep Will company for hours. Mike, who was sitting next to Will in his bed, got out a deck of cards and dealt everyone in for a quick game of BS. 

Jane didn’t quite get the game until they played a couple of times, but she eventually got the hang of it, she was an unstoppable beast. 

Mike and Lucas had a competition to see who could get the most cards, which was the opposite of the object of the game. So every time someone played anything, one of them would call “BS” and then get all of the cards in the stack. It was eventually because of of these two that everyone got bored or playing. 

One by one after that, people started leaving. First it was Max saying she had practice for some sport, then Lucas, claiming he had to babysit. Lastly Dustin left, because of something about a cat. 

This just left Mike, who very clearly wasn’t leaving any time soon. He leaned over to Will, whispering something in his ear, both boys giggling. Jane smiled at the sight. 

Joyce looked down at her watch, gasping when she realized what time it was. 

“Oh do they serve food here?” She asked Hopper, who shrugged, because how would he know? He’s a cop, not a doctor. The man then left, saying something about being needed at the station. 

Joyce shook her head and began walking to the door. 

“I’m going to go try to find a cafeteria or something, Jane do you want to come with me?” She said, and Jane could never turn down an adventure, so she quickly nodded. 

***

“You need me to do what?” Billy asked, judgement lacing his tone. Mike sighed. 

“Tell all the ladies at the pool you’ve seduced that if they work for us then you’ll do something for them,” he explained again, Steve shaking his head in confusion. 

“What will I do for them?” He asked, leaning back on the couch. The boys shrugged. 

“I don’t know. Give them a signed photo of you shirtless. Spend a night with them-“

“No!” Steve interrupted, Billy shaking his head but laughing nonetheless. 

***

Following after her step mother, Jane looked around the white halls of the hospital, hating the familiarity, but enjoying each new thing she saw, like the cool water fountain in the middle of a lobby. 

After a solid 15 minutes of walking around, Joyce gave in and asked some rando where the cafeteria was. He gave her the directions, and the two were off. They made it halfway to the cafe before Joyce stopped in her tracks. 

“Go ask what the boys want, will you dear?” She said, gently pushing Jane around to the opposite direction, adamant on the girl going. She nodded, and tried her best to remember how to get back to Will’s room. 

Eventually she made it, and deciding there was no reason to knock, barged into the room. She then discovered that yes, there WAS a reason to knock. 

“Holy shit!” She shouted, startling Will and Mike away from each other. They had been kissing, that’s all, but still, it was a shock. 

“Jane what kind of language is that?” Mike asked, but Will slapped him on the arm and turned towards his step sister. 

“You can’t tell anybody what you saw!” He said, clutching Mike’s hand tightly. Jane looked baffled. 

“Why?” The two boys looked at each other, wondering how to answer. 

“Well some people wouldn’t like that we’re together,” Will said, earning a scoff from Mike who thought it was ridiculous that people were homophobic. 

“Because some people are thirsting after you guys?” Mike laughed at Jane’s absurd reaction. 

“Everyone thirsts after Mike, yeah,” Will said, and smiled at his boyfriend. 

“But I’m only thirsting for you,” it was sappy and romantic and Jane knew they’d be together forever. 

“What do you guys want to eat?”

~*~

“All we have left is Lucas,” Will said, and Mike smiled at him. “This is the best plan of them all,”

***

Lucas couldn’t believe what was happening. 

The Party was in the front, the seats reserved for them, as they were all closest to Mike, compared to the rest of his extended family. 

Next to him, Will was sobbing, but because he’s a soft and quiet kid, he was silently sobbing. It was even more pitiful. 

Dustin, Max and Jane were all crying as well, but none were as wrecked as Will, which made sense, because Will and Mike are the closest in the group.

WERE the closest. Not anymore. 

***

“What do you mean it’s the best plan?” Mike asked, looking over the plan in the binder. He gasped when he read it. “I see what you mean, this is the best plan,”

***

They were called up to the viewing, Will first in line to see Mike. 

It was an open casket funeral, and Lucas was dreading seeing his friend’s body. He stood there in line contemplating whether or not it’d be socially acceptable to sit back down so he wouldn’t have to see Mike like that. Behind him, Max gave his hand a gentle squeeze, and Lucas knew he had to stay. 

Will was the first to say goodbye to Mike. It was heartbreaking to see the boy in front of the casket, tears streaming down his face. 

Lucas realized why everyone wears black to a funeral. You can’t see tear stains on a black suit. 

From next to Will Lucas heard a loud sneeze, which was odd because Will always sneezes very quietly, but when he looked up, the boy was covering his mouth with his arm, so Lucas figured he was so overtaken by grief to sneeze quietly today. 

***

Mike was laying in the casket, his nose dripping a bit, as he had gotten a cold from Will when they were in the hospital, because his boyfriend had neglected to tell him he actually WAS sick. Not sick enough to warrant a hospital visit, that was staged, but sick enough that now when Mike has faked his death, he really needed to sneeze. Goddamnit. 

***

“They’ve gone too far,” Steve mumbled to Billy from their place in the back of the crowd. The other man nodded in agreement. 

***

Lucas walked up to the casket when it was his turn, and gasped at the sight of his friend. He almost looked serene, but also wrong. His cheeks weren’t a happy pink, his eyes were closed and hollow, it was bad. 

Lucas choked on a sob, his fists clenched as he remembered everything the Party had gone through, only for Mike to be taken down by some random illness. 

“I’m so sorry,” he managed, before ultimately deciding it was time to sit down. He cried his way back to his seat. 

Will was next to him, staring with blank eyes ahead of him, clearly not registering anything that was happening before him. 

“Will?” Lucas said, resting a gentle hand on the other boy’s shoulder. “I’m sorry,” he gave him a weak smile. 

“You have nothing to apologize for,” Will said, his smile breaking as he started crying again. 

***

“But why am I the one faking my death?” Mike asked, looking at his boyfriend. Will wanted to answer, but also didn’t. 

“Well,”

“Yeah?”

“It’s like,”

“Yeah!?!”

“If I faked my death, everyone would be like “oH My GoD ItS tHE upSiDE DoWN” 

Mike nodded. “Fair,”

“And I don’t want my mom to worry,”

“I totally get it,”

***

Sniffles could be heard throughout the people gathered at the funeral, but besides for Mike’s mom and Nancy, clearly nobody was as affected by this as Will was. 

Lucas opened his arms, and Will quickly went in for a hug, desperately hanging on as if he’d fall away at any moment without Lucas there to keep him up. 

After a few moment, Max sat down on the other side of Lucas, and leaned over to talk to Will. 

“He loved you. So so much,” she said, smiling despite her tears. 

“Thank you,” he whispered. 

***

“Ok,” Steve said, looking around. “Now they’ve gone too far,”

It has been a few hours since the funeral, and everyone was gathered around a plot of land in the cemetery. 

“Michale may have left us to finish his journey,” the pastor was saying, reading off of a piece of paper that was tucked into what looked like a Bible, for some reason. “But he will always be with us, in spirit, and in our memories,”

Lucas turned away, looking for Will in the group of people. He was towards the back, which didn’t surprise him, but there was a tent set up because it was sprinkling a bit, yet Will was outside the tent. 

“Feel that breeze?” There was no breeze. “That is Mike’s breath, Mike’s spirit here, watching over us,”

Maybe Will was in the rain so it was indistinguishable from his tears. 

“Michale Wheeler is alive in our hearts,” the pastor then sat down, allowing for someone else to speak. Nancy walked up to the front. 

“Mike was a blessing in disguise. It was in disguise because most of the time, he was a pest,” a few people laughed, but not that many, because they’re literally burying Mike’s ashes, this isn’t a time for jokes. 

Lucas blocked out the rest of the speeches, deciding instead to think about Mike. How amazing of a friend he was. Mike had first come up to Lucas, Will trailing behind, and asked if they wanted to be friends, back when he was the newest kid in the school. Everyone had already had friends, and no one wanted to add another to their cliques, but then Mike came up and offered their friendship, and Lucas knew he’d be friends with these two for a very long time. 

Not as long as he would have liked, though. Seeing the container of Mike’s ashes as opposed to the actual body wasn’t any easier. 

***

“So just to be clear: we’re not cremating me?” Mike asked like a total fucking moron. 

“No you ARE getting cremated, but we aren’t ACTUALLY cremating you,” Mike nodded. 

“What are we using for ashes then?”

“How about the dust off your dad’s dick?”

***

The service was over. Mike’s ashes were in the ground under his tombstone, and almost everyone had cleared out. 

It was nearly pouring by now, and Max was waiting for Lucas in her car. He just needed to say goodbye to Mike one last time. 

He made his way towards the grave, thinking about what he was going to say, but stopped abruptly when he was Will on his knees in front of it. 

He stood there silently, not wanting to interrupt his friend’s grieving, but couldn’t help but hear something Will said. 

“I love you, so so much,” 

Now this could mean a lot of things. It could just be Will saying he loved Mike in a platonic way, as Lucas wouldn’t hesitate to say he also loved Mike, but this didn’t sound like that. Gravestone confessions are pretty popular. 

Lucas knew exactly what was happening when Will started standing up, but said one last thing. 

“I will never forget you, my darling,” 

Ignoring how Will totally sounded like a rich widow reading the last letter her husband ever sent to her, Lucas figured out what Will meant. 

“You two were together, weren’t you?” He said, startling Will. The boy looked ready to say something, but gave up halfway through and just broke into tears. 

“He’s the love of my life,”

Lucas was crying again, damnit. He opened his arms up, slowly walking towards his friend. Will quickly hugged him, tears mixing with the rain soaking his shirt. 

“I’m sorry,” Lucas whispered, knowing he had to do one thing, and that was comfort his friend. “That was a pretty shitty thing of him to do, dying like that,” Lucas mumbled, getting a laugh out of Will. 

“Yeah,” He agreed, staring at the sky. “But I love him anyway,”

Lucas didn’t notice how Will didn’t change tenses, still talking about Mike as if he were alive. Had he noticed, he’d have just reasoned that Will was deeply in grief, or still loves Mike despite his passing. 

Lucas clutched Will tighter. 

Will turned to him, panic evident in his tear filled eyes.

“You can’t tell anyone,” he said, his fingers digging deeper into Lucas’ shoulder than was comfortable. He smiled. 

“Of course not, Will, I wouldn’t tell anyone, not after all of this,” he said, his hand resting on the other boy’s shoulder. Will smiled, glad he and Mike could cross Lucas off the list.

***  
“That’s everyone,” Will said, laughing at Mike’s funeral makeup. “Please go wash your face, I don’t want to feel like I’m making out with a dead body,” at that mention, Mike’s face lit up.

“Now we can both be zombie boy!” he said, knowing full well he deserved the pillow thrown at his face. When it hit the ground and had the perfect imprint of Mike’s powder covered face, both boys laughed.

It took Mike a solid 15 minutes to scrub his face, but he eventually sat back down with Will, happy to be able to cuddle after having to sit in a casket for hours.

“What do we do now?” Mike asked, smiling at his boyfriend. Will shrugged.

“I pretty much assumed we would be making out right about now,” he said, smirking at the intense blush that spread across Mike’s face.

“No,” he eventually got out after choking on air for a brief minute. “I mean about the Party, how are we going to tell them?” Will grinned.

“I have a plan,”

~*~

It was a surprise to everyone when Will invited them all over to his house, just hours after Mike’s funeral. They assumed it was because he wanted his friends there to grieve, and all made their way quickly to his house. Jane had been with Max and Lucas, Max having given both of them a ride to a park where they planned to look at the sunset in the rain like edgy kids do when their friend just died.

Knocking on Will’s door, they were surprised when they got no answer. Shrugging, they motioned for Dustin to knock again, and then eventually ring the doorbell. Still no response.

“Well,” Jane said, pulling out her key ring. “It IS my house,” and she opened the door. They all filed in, not noticing anything unusual, until they saw the living room.

Will was on the couch making out with someone.

Lucas’ first thought was “wow so much for ‘love of my life’ and all that shit,”, which was similar to Jane’s, which was “oh my god what about Mike?” 

Everyone was thinking pretty much the same thing, actually, because they had all seen Will and Mike being all coupley and gross, and had pretty much assumed neither of them would ever love anyone else as much as they loved each other.

Then the Party started shouting their thoughts and feelings, some distinct lines being: “what about Mike?” and “Mike JUST died,” and “come on Will you invited us over,” and “ew,”

Will pulled away from the person and turned to face his friends. “Hey guys, you came faster than I expected,” he said nonchalantly, acting as if it wasn’t totally out of character for him to be making out with someone mere hours after his boyfriend’s funeral.

“Will WHAT?”

“Ah yeah this is Mike’s cousin, Richie,” he said, leaning back reveal Mike Wheeler himself, not some loser that apparently looked like Mike. Mike slapped Will.

“Sup guys, wanna play D&D?” Mike asked, seemingly not noticing the shocked faces of his friends. He got no response. “Is that a no?”

“Your FUNERAL was today!” Max screeched, and Mike looked over at the calendar hanging on the wall.

“Oh was that today? Shit, sorry I missed it guys,” he said, smiling in an apologetic way that made Dustin realize just how good of an actor Mike was.

“I CRIED OVER YOUR DEAD BODY, WHEELER!” Lucas shouted, and Jane sat down to process what the hell was going on. Mike smiled.

“Yes, I remember that! Thanks,” he said, glad to know his friends would be upset that he died.

“Mike what the FUCK?” Jane yelled, a soft “language” coming from Jonathan in the other room. He shrugged.

“Well you know how people fake being sick to get out of school?” he asked, and the Party nodded. “Well I did sorta the same thing,” he said in a tone like he had no idea why people were freaking out so much about it.

In the few moments of silence they got, Will leaned back in to kiss Mike again. Max immediately spoke up.

“Right is no one else going to talk about that?” She said, looking around to see everyone else’s reactions, surprised when she heard 3 “I already knew”’s

They all started talking about when they found out, only stopping once they heard a door shut loudly. They looked at the now vacated couch, and figured they did NOT want to be around to hear Mike and Will fucking, so they left.

Jane stayed of course, as she lived there, but she went to Jonathan’s room and begged him to turn on some loud music instead.

***

“That worked like a charm!” Will said, smiling at Mike from his position on his lap. His boyfriend agreed.

“I really feel like we didn’t take it too far at all!” Mike said completely unsarcastically. Will nodded.

“Yeah! So are you staying the night?” He asked, wrapping his arms around Mike’s shoulders. 

“I mean I don’t have to ask, my parents think I’m dead,” he said, shrugging a bit at his boyfriend.

“Mike you were supposed to tell your parents you’re alive,”

“Shit,”

**Author's Note:**

> Some random person: How should I come out to my friends?  
> Mike: fake your death
> 
> Send me prompts and requests to my Tumblr @llama-raptor-russian-bean


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